Yesterday and today.

I recently started adding people I have not seen or heard of for years to my Facebook account. I was a bit reluctant, considering I have only allowed a few family members. Why?

Well I had a terrible experience when I did not understand social media a few years ago. I thought. “add anyone and if they turn out crazy. Delete them.” Imagine an account with five thousand and followers. Of this group their was plenty of crazy ones and plenty of women looking for a husband too. It was so big I could not manage. It was causing me anxiety and I deleted about two months after opening it.

These days I am adding authors mostly and fellow bloggers. I have open the door up to some old forgotten friends. When you have not seen people for a decade and everyone has changed its fascinating and weird. My life was totally different ten years ago. I wondered where to start.

The first thing I decided, I must do, is meet people where they are at always. It’s not a competition who has changed and grown the most. The idea of the relationship is friendship and sharing a bit of our life.

“Where love reigns, there is no will to power; and where the will to power is paramount, love is lacking” 

Carl Gustav Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who founded analytical psychology

I am not a competitive person. I don’t enjoy seeing others fail miserably. If I am good at something I don’t hide if it is helpful in a situation. I try never to never make another person feel hopeless. Healthy competition is fun and good for us but not narcissistic behaviour.

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) involves a pattern of self centered, arrogant thinking and behavior, a lack of empathy and consideration for other people, and an excessive need for admiration. Others often describe people with NPD as cocky, manipulative, selfish, patronising, and demanding.

Somethings will never change. This means we all have common ground as human beings. We all understand suffering, and loss. People are suffering many things from illness and heart break. Most people can relate to misfortune. I am honest with people and this gives them the space too. This works with happiness and joy, but we must be carful if a friend is suffering terribly. Sensitivity is not only for girls. Telling someone about your great new lover when theirs just cheated or died on them is not the way to offer friendship.

My point social media can be respected and treat your friends well. They are not another like for our egos. They are not book sales. They are people with feeling and concerns just like you and me. I am making an effort to treat people on here, “the internet” as well as I would talking to them in my lounge.

It is not painful to admit we are wrong and change how we behave on social media platforms. We all make mistakes and today is the best day to change our ways and treat people with respect and dignity.

Comfortable with uncertainty.

When we are out of touch with our awareness of uncertainty, needless stress and suffering can occur. Take, for instance, the way it feels to express some view that we later learn is wrong. If we ask ourselves what it feels like when we express something wrong, we might say it feels awful, embarrassing, or uncomfortable. But actually, that is not really true. At the time that we are speaking, if we don’t know that we are wrong, then it feels just the same as when we are right because at the point we think we are correct and believe that we have said is true. As soon as we learn of our mistake, however, we likely will feel embarrassed – but only if at the time we expressed our view, we hadn’t been open to the real possibility that our view might be wrong in the first place.

Luang Por Pasanno.

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